Buck Up!

It’s official: I’m having a bad week. It’s only Wednesday, I know, so there’s still hope but every single day this week has been low and it sucks, particularly because I had such a great week last week.

This morning I really struggled to get out of bed. That’s a pretty common occurrence these days unfortunately. But alas, life must go on. So up I got, woke the kids and got on with my day. Two hours later I’m sitting in my car at the work car park and I feel numb, shell-like. Empty without my soul.

Whatever is happening to me, it’s scary.

I feel like I’m losing touch with who I used to be, the creative, fun, silly, whimsical and philosophical person I once was.

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In my endless quest to understand depression and how to fight it, I made my way to a nearby bookstore and ambled around in search of a self-help book. Now, if you know anything about me (which you likely won’t), you’ll know I absolutely loathe self-help books or anything that remotely seems to follow a “whoa is me” path. I just want to scream “Buck up!” at the author. So to actively pursue this genre means, for me, I’ve hit rock bottom in the way of where to turn.

I was sort of shocked and gravely disappointed that between learning how to cope with Alzheimer’s, cancer and diabetes, there was no literature on depression and this is just another indicator that depression is still largely misunderstood and almost taboo.

In lieu of self-help books, here’s a list of things I’m doing or working on to help me along the way:

  1. I’ve started to follow several blogs dedicated to the topic of depression – I’m not in this fight alone and if you’re suffering from depression and have come across this blog, neither are you. Let’s fight this together!
  2. I recently purchased the 52 Lists for Happiness journal that inspires positivity, balance and joy through making lists of things that will help me reflect and acknowledge on the things which truly make me happy, and allow me to invest in those things.
  3. I absolutely love striking photography so I’ve begun a collection of photos I’ve found online of random people smiling, laughing and enjoying life. Do you ever notice when you’re in the presence of someone laughing or grinning from ear-to-ear it makes you want to laugh/smile too? Exactly.
  4. I’ve created an ever-growing playlist of feel-good music on YouTube; songs that make me smile or sing out loud, which I find helps tremendously on downers.

If you have any other ideas I’d love to hear them and maybe we can start a list of our own for others also suffering from depression.

Naz xo

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2 thoughts on “Buck Up!

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  1. I’m firstly sorry to read that you feel this way. That’s the thing with depression. It can strike you down from the most unexpected of places!

    However thank you for highlighting the fact that mental illness is still very much a taboo subject in society. It’s sadly true. And it’s why I try to write about it as much as possible. I know I won’t change the world. But as you say, with a combined effort it’s possible!

    Like

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